Katie's Health Update #9

So my last health update was only a few a weeks ago here but since then I have a few things to update you all on.

COLITIS
Yesterday I had an appointment at the hospital for a check up and instead of the appointment being under the Gastroenterology clinic, it was under the general surgery clinic which I didn't understand why to be honest and nor did the Doctor. Luckily the doctor I saw is someone I have been under for nearly 3 years now so she knew my history and what was going on. She looked at my report from my last colonoscopy and explained where my Colitis is and told me a lot more than I ever have been told. I explained to her how I don't think Asacol are doing much for me anymore and my flare up is so unbearable at the moment. She wrote me out a prescription for Steroids (not sure what they called) and has put me under the Gastroenterology department and for them to see me urgent/in few weeks time. I took my Mother with me and I am glad to be honest as it is always different from a doctor explaining my condition rather than me. So although my flare up is bad at the moment, my fatigue is horrible, still loosing weight and eyes are being affected but I felt like finally the hospital are doing something about it. 

ARTHRITIS
My Gabapentin medication have been upped to 300mg and the side effects from the 200mg was affecting me a lot so now it is higher the side effects are worse. The side effects are worth it to be honest as the medication itself does help with my back pain. I get  days where my back is in bits and then days where it is manageable with painkillers but never a day where I am not in pain. Over the past few weeks the pain has been going back of bum, legs and near my hips which happens every now and then. When the weather gets cold my Arthritis plays up a lot so although I love the cold weather, I am not looking forward to it.
  
ANXIETY/DEPRESSION/PANIC ATTACKS
My depression hasn't been good to be honest, I've had more down days than up days this month. My GP has upped my Sertraline to 200mg and have referred me to an Psychiatrist. My GP explained that because he has upped my dose of Antidepressants and I haven't heard back from Therapy than he feels that me being seen by an Psychiatrist will be more helpful than waiting for an Therapist appointment. I told him how the more pain I get with both of my illnesses that the more depressed I feel and as I can't control any of my illnesses/they wont get cured that I feel like I need to learn how to control my depression ASAP. As for my Anxiety that is always there in the back on my mind in some way or another. Whether if I am not in an anxious place, I will always feel on edge. I wrote a post HERE about fear and Guilt of an Chronic Illness and in this post I explained what fear I have lately and part of that is feeling anxious. As for my Panic Attacks, I haven't really been in any panicky environment to make me panic lately. I went to Essex at the beginning of August and obviously I've mentioned how I used to have a fear of trains ect and that is where my panic attacks started but I have gotten over the fear but I still do panic as I think it would be totally impossible of me to stop panicking while I am on the tube/train. My Brother picked me up on the way there and on the way back I got the tube and train back and luckily the tube was there quick and so was the train so I didn't have any time to panic.

OTHER
I wrote a post HERE about my Eye dramas over the past few weeks so read that if you want to know what happened. I am still on eye drops and to be honest the eye pain has gone but both of my eyes are still so red. The eye Doctor did explain how he was worried as people with Colitis/Ankylosing Spondylitis do get bad eyes so he did say he was going to send me to an specialist so I guess I shall have to wait for that appointment letter to come through. That's pretty much it for my health this month and I have no more appointments left for this month. In September I have Dietician which is to do with my Colitis as I am struggling with what to eat lately and then I have my Monthly GP app middle of the month.

I shall keep you all posted on how I get on with the Steroids for my Colitis which I haven't got yet as the chemist had to order them in. Also touch wood my eyes start to get better.

Love Katie xx  

Pain Is Lonely

I saw this quote on Pinterest and instantly  agreed and can relate to it so much. Having two Chronic Illnesses has made my life changed so much and most of the time I feel lonely. I have to decline some family events or days out because of the pain which makes me incredulity down and lonely. I spend most days at home, in my bedroom, in pain and dosed up on painkillers and other medication I'm on. Apart from the rare occasion of days out, the only day trips are hospital and doctors appointments. I see my GP twice a month which can be more it depends, consultant for my Colitis, consultant for my Back and Pain Management Clinic  so my diary is always filled up with appointments. Soon to have a check up update appointment on my fertility/ovary ect which will mean doctors/nurse app, ultrasound and then to a gynaecologist and not forgetting the blood tests I have regularly. Being ill itself is like a full time job and I hate when people think we are lazy and I tell you what, I would swap my pain for a normal full time job anyday. 

Pain wakes me up at 3/4am so I can be up til 6am and that when I feel lonely most. I'm so glad one of my dogs sleeps in my bedroom overnight. Buster always wakes up if I'm in pain to check how I am, he is a bloody diamond. Pain can even make me feel mad and angry sometimes. Angry that I can't sleep, angry when I get to sleep that the pain wakes me up, angry when family members think I'm lazy, angry when you don't see the doctor you trust and always see, angry when they say " We need to see you in 6/8 weeks but we have no appointments til 3 months time", angry when the chemist give you wrong amont of tablets, angry when the chemist  forgets to put in a certain medication. There are many more reasons that make me angry, mad and lonely but I would be here all day if I said them all. 

I've always be a person who likes their own company but since being ill it's made me realise how much I'm greatful for when I spend time with people. A weekend in Essex with my family is basically like a holiday for me and I try to not let pain get to me. Although pain is there constantly but when I'm happy with people I love I make myself try to ignore it. The train/tube journey to Essex absolutely kills my back & last time I was feeling sick due to my medication side effects but I tried to put that to the back of my mind and think of the reason I'm on the train. 

Pain is lonely but people with Chronis Illnesses and people who suffer with pain we need to not let it make us anymore lonely. Also it is totally okay to feel lonely and it is normal to, don't let people make you think you're lazy. We are ill for god sake and the amont of bloody side effect medications gives us we are totally allowed to rest. 

Love Katie xx 

Katie's Health Update #5

Pics from my last operation.

Opps!! Its been well over a month since I done my last update here. I have honestly had so much going on that I have forgotten lol!! So my last update I told you all that I was getting ready for my next operation on the 29th January and I posted about it here. Click on that link to hear more but without going into too much detail it hurt so much, the actual operation and recovery itself was so painful. I get the results from this operation and my operation in December on 20th Feb so soon which I shall keep you all updated on. 



I also had my back specialist appointment few days before my last operation and I didn't get any answers I thought I would of gotten. The specialist I never seen her before and in all honesty I didn't like her, she didn't ask much questions, didn't read my notes properly and basically she has forward me to another specialist. That is only problem with my back people is that I never see the same person which is annoying. The first person I saw who is my actual main doctor for back she was brilliant but I never saw her again. My back is same and as always getting worse, it was a year the other day that I started getting this pain and nothing has really been done, I've just been given loads of medications and I feel abit fed up. So lets hope the other specialist they have referred to can give me answers. 

Bandage.. rather attractive haha 

Another thing that has recently started.. Few weeks ago I started getting pain and aches in my right wrist and just put it down to slept funny on it/cold weather but it was getting worse and seeing as I had a doctors app the week after it started I thought I would mention it to him. He has given me some gel and told to apply a bandage type on which helps alot but have to go back next time I go to see if any better if not he going to do a xray. He said it might be related to my back problems which is why he wants to keep an eye on it. The gel doesn't seem to do anything to be honest as I don't notice the pain go when I apply it. Sometimes the bandage helps alot and sometimes it makes it worse. It's something I never really suffered with and because it is my right hand as seeing as Im a righty I think it makes it worse because naturally I use that hand more. Its made simple tasks seem harder. I hope it just a pain that will go soon to be honest. I went bowling the other weekend for Beth's mum birthday and no idea how but I won bowling even though I was in alot of pain with my wrist and back lol 


I didn't know whether to write about this because it quite personal but I thought I might help someone. I was first diagnosed with Depression 10 years ago this year and while at my last doctor check up, the doctor just randomly ask me how I was feeling? and I sort of poured my heart out to him and thought I might aswel be honest to him. He is a newish doctor to me but I trust him as he has been so good with my back. I've been feeling depressed, anxiety and getting alot of panic attacks over the past few months, although I had all above for ages but recently it has got worse and I didn't want to admit it. The doctor booked a double appointment for the next week to speak more, so I went to the appointment and weirdly I opened up easily. He suggested talking therapy but its something I don't feel that would help at the moment, I've had therapy on/off since I was 12 so I didn't feel like it would help right now. Im not saying it doesn't help because it does but in my life right now I don't feel like its for me. I have Beth in my life now who I can talk to about everything so I know she is sort of my way of "therapy". So he suggested going back on Anti Depressant and at first I was like Hmmm... But think I thought to myself there is no harm of trying them again, I've been on so many types but my life is alot different now so why not give them ago. He has prescribed me ones that I was on few years ago and ones that are safe for me as Im on a few other medication. So I only been on them a week and obviously from previous years I know they take ages to kick in so I can't say much about them. I urge anyone who feels low or down to tell your doctor, I wished I done it months ago to be honest. Just telling your doctor takes a massive weight of your shoulders. 

image from pinterest.

Another thing that I haven't told the doctor about but Im going to mention it because its turning me into an emotional wreck. I've been having Insomnia for so long now. I haven't told doctors as I thought it would go but its getting too much now. I have tried so much to help but nothing seems to work. I could have the busiest weekend and still not sleep arghhhhh. 

That's all for my #5 health update, I will do it next month in the first week rather than leaving it for so long like last time. opps! Got my bowel specialist on Friday so hopefully I will get some answers :) 

Love Katie x 

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This Week : Exhaustion/Emotion

This week by Katie..

This picture explains how we all including the dogs have felt this week..

Oh Jesus what are stressful week!! Exciting things happen like my getting an iPhone 6 (my upgrade) and getting more Xmas pressies for everyone but then Beth got rushed to hospital and then I found out my operation is on 24th December yes Christmas Eve.


Beth is now out of hospital and is alot better so now it is just a waiting game on Bella and Beth got to keep an eye on her breathing as if it continues she has to go straight back to hospital. It has been so weird not being close to her while she was in hospital as last time it happened she was living in Windsor, So I was around to look after Ava and had regular updates on Beth and Bella but it was quite difficult with the hospital being in Essex this time. 

My operation!!! ARGHHH. So I knew I was expecting to get a call or a letter to tell me when Im having it done but my Specialist did say it 80% chance of it being in the new year as its close to Xmas... Well I obviously was in that 20% of having the operation this year. Its nothing to do with my back and its abit too much detail to go into the actual op itself but I'm kind of glad now it will be before the new year so then next year I will just have my Back to concentrate on. I actually have zero plans for Xmas eve and day so the op hasn't bothered me but at first I was like OMG!!! Although it is day surgery, I don't get into hospital til pm so there a likely I might have to stay in overnight if anything goes wrong ect but waking up in hospital on Xmas day will defiantly be different!!! 

Getting an iPhone 6!!! Now my upgrade on my iPhone 5 was due over 2 months ago but I generally kept forgetting to go into a Vodafone shop to sort it out. I knew I wanted an Iphone 6 and also knew I would have to pay £99 for the phone as my Iphone 5 was abit old, the buttons were either broken, slow or on the way to die and also was full of scratches. So I saved up money to get the phone, but I didn't expect Vodafone buy back to want my phone for £70 so I only ended up paying £29!! Tbh the phone aint much difference from the 5 but the battery, camera and screen is alot better!! I got the spray grey one and have a lovely mint green case for it. 

I had a few gifts left to buy for Ava's 3rd birthday which is on 6th December, and while I had to wait for my phones to be sorted I had an hour to spare and luckily I found and got everything I wanted for Ava birthday gifts and also more stuff for her Christmas. Maybe I will do a blog post on how I done her birthday and Christmas as their only 2 weeks apart. I decided her birthday was peppa pig themed pressies and Christmas is Frozen themed pressies and it has worked out to be sooo easy and enjoyable to buy.


I did plan to get back into blogging a few times a week this week but I can't seem to find the motivation and passion for it lately. I might do a post on how low I've been feeling and how it has effect so much of my life lately. Here is just a quick update/this week kinda of post. I don't think Beth will be continuing her Pregnant update post as she isn't very well, shes busy and also Bella is expecting to come any day soon but I will speak to her and plan a blog post for when Bella is born. Hope you all are well and are getting into the Christmas spirit :) 

Lots of love
Katie xx 
  

A Blog Update

Where have we been?

So few weeks ago we had no other choice than to take a break on our blog due to many reasons which can't be said online. But Me and Bethany are not living in the same house at the moment and where Beth is, she hasn't got a laptop or WIFI so she has been doing her best to keep up to date with her pregnancy update via her phone and rubbish wifi. I obviously have got access to laptop and internet but past few weeks I have been extremely down, ill and lack of motivation to even switch on the laptop. I didn't want to write a blog post just for the sake of it. Hopefully in the early months of 2015 we should have our blog back it's normal 2 blog post a day but for now we will be trying our hardest to keep you up to date with Beth's pregnancy and also few other random post. 

With Beth being back in Essex and me being in Windsor it has meant we haven't seen each other at all over the past weeks which has been so so weird as we were so used to living with each other daily. Not only is Beth my soon to be Sister In Law but she is also my closest friend so it has been hard without her also not having my Niece and Brother around has been so lonely. So the post we use to write together will obviously be taking abit of a break but hopefully our separate updates and other blog post will start again and be back to normal in the new year. 


Essex To Windsor will hopefully and we hope will be back to normal in 2015 where we hope will a new fresh start for all of us and for our blog. We apologies in advance if some days or weeks there is no content and obviously with Bella due any day soon, Ava's 3rd birthday, Christmas and My operation/health there will be days/weeks when it's impossible to write. Sorry!!! 


Lots Of Love,

Katie xx 

35 Weeks Pregnancy Update

Sorry it's a day late! It's been and eventful week to say the least, but to you all following my pregnancy I want to keep you updated! 

How pregnant are you? 

I'm 35weeks +1 

How many days until due date:

I have 33 days until my due date! Not long! 

Weight: I still have no idea ha ha

Pregnancy symptoms:  I was sick yesterday morning for the first time, and my spd symptoms.

Stretch Marks: No more than last week! 

Cravings: Chocolate still! 

Movement: Bella is getting very active moving more during the day and not just in the evening! 

Gender: girl 

Sleep: sleeps okay at the moment :) 

Worst moment this week: For personal reasons I can't say the most worst moment this week! But loosing my belly bar has annoyed me! 

Best moment this week: Best moment this week was seeing how much stuff bella has! Washing her clothes.

Nesting: I have been a bit more domestic this week! Suppose you can say I'm nesting!

Labour signs: I've had a few tightenings 

Belly button in or out? In 

Wedding rings on or off? Still on :)

Happy or moody most of the time: happy with a bit of moody! Ha ha 

Looking forward to: I'm looking forward to cuddling my little girl when she's here :) 

Lots Of Love

Beth...xxx

Having A Colposcopy

Today I had an Colposcopy as a few month's ago I had some bleeding and my GP found a Polyp on my cervix on a routine internal so the GP forward me onto the Colposcopy clinic. During the time of waiting for this appointment I have stopped bleeding so I wasn't too concerned or worried. Off I went to my local hospital today and stupidly the Colposcopy clinic is right next to the labour ward so the waiting room as so busy and loud but to be honest it took away my nerves. I was called early to my appointment so literally only just sat down to wait. As I walked into the room, I saw this chair with padded support to put your legs on and all this camera equipment and I started to feel scared. The gynecologist went through my medical history and talked me through what was going to happen. So of I went and took my bottom half clothing off, luckily I was wearing dress and tights so at least my dress was kept on. I sat down on this chair and was giving a sheet to put over my private/leg area and I put both legs on those padded leg rest and the gyne pressed a button to make the chair high. She told me to "relax" which is the stupidest thing to say as it is almost impossible to. She inserted a speculum which I've had loads of times before I knew what to expected,It's not painful but is very uncomfortable. Then she inserted an Colposcope to examine my cervix and on the screen next to me I could see inside me which was very strange image. She done some swabbing and other stuff which was very uncomfortable but the pain was sort of okay. Then the gyne found something she was concerned about and wanted to remove it to be sent of for a biopsy. She pre warned me it was going to be abit painful but OH MY GOD. I saw the scissor instrument thing she was using and Jesus it was big..I was looking at the screen when she inserted it. It stung so much and then she had to take more from it and done it again. It was like a one of pain but I was close to tears. Not only was the way I was laying down was making my back hurt but I felt so uncomfortable down there. She removed the speculum and I got up and put my tights back on. I felt so sore and pain down there and similar to a period pain but alot worse. The Gyne explained how I will be bleeding down there for a few weeks and not to get my cervix wet so no swimming or baths for 7 days but can have a shower. As I was walking back to the car I started feeling more pain and started crying as the pain while walking came on all of a sudden and because I didn't expect pain like that I didn't prepare myself. I will be getting a letter in two weeks for my results of the biopsy and to go to my GP when I have the letter so my GP can explain everything. So fingers crossed that nothing is wrong. 

On the way home from the hospital we got caught in alot of traffic and I just wanted to get home, put my pj's on and lay down. Finally after 40 mins in traffic, I got home and instantly got into my pj's and now laying on the sofa feeling very sore and in pain. I've took my normal painkillers I take for my back but the pain hasn't really settled and have got a hot water bottle. The nurse told me to rest for 24 hours and try not to do much but it's really hard to just sit down and not do anything. Thank god I can blog and spend the afternoon on the laptop. I shall update you all on the biopsy results.


Now I shall continue being in pain while looking at my wish list for Christmas haha. 


Love Katie xx